July 25, 2024

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General For All

‘My Future In-Laws Are Assholes!’

The Cut’s advice columnist Heather Havrilesky answers readers’ questions about how to be in the world. Got a question for Polly? Email [email protected].

Photo: Anup Shah/Getty Images

Dear Polly,

First off, thank you for your utter candor and wisdom. Your column has helped me through many challenging times, and I appreciate how you make me feel okay to eat pie in my pajamas at 3 p.m. on a weekday. Second off, I hate my future brother-in-law and his wife. They’re assholes.

When I first started dating my boyfriend two years ago, I met his brother about six months into the relationship. It was over dinner while he was in town for work (we don’t live in the same city, thank sweet baby Jesus), and while I proceeded to ask him questions and attempted to engage with him, he couldn’t bring himself to ask me anything or even feign interest in getting to know me. Every time I left space open in the conversation for him to start a new topic or give him the opportunity to ask me something, silence followed. To my bewilderment, he texted my boyfriend after dinner with something along the lines of how great it was to meet me and what a great time he had. I wonder if we attended the same dinner.